Gratitude, The Challenge....

Socks

365:D134

An item of clothing that is used to cover ones feet, keeping them dry and warm.

For as long as I can remember, I have received socks for Christmas and on birthdays. Not just a pair of socks but a bundle of socks to last for the whole year. Christmas socks have always been super thick and warm because it has been known to get down below freezing a time or two and occasionally we get an ice storm. Summer socks or running socks have been given to me on my birthday, June baby here. The kind that prevents your feet from sweating in your shoes. Usually very thin and stop at the ankle. Here it gets hot in the summertime, so hot that flip flops are the choice for foot attire unless you have some weird job that requires closed toe shoes.

I never understood why my mom always gave me socks. For most of my life, I have wore flip flops or sandals for at least ten months out of the year. She knew this but always wanted me to have plenty of socks just in case I needed them. Just in case my feet got cold. If the chance comes that your feet do get cold, it is nearly impossible to warm the rest of your body. This is something learned with age. The importance of socks today has increased immensely. Even if I have my flip flops, I have a pair of socks in my bag just in case my feet get cold.

A couple of years ago, I received two pairs of socks from my students on Christmas. Instantly I thought, what a strange gift. Who gives socks for Christmas??? The answer, mothers give socks for Christmas. They want their children to be protected, warm and safe. I still have a pair that my mom gave me when I was in the eighth grade. I remember this because Liz Claiborne was the thing. So she got me a pair of Liz Claiborne socks stuffed inside of a Liz Claiborne purse. The softest most comfortable socks in the world!! A sock that has made it through the years, has many holes and very warn. Socks that should only be worn in the comfort of my own home but I wear them and I was not ashamed of them until yesterday. Yesterday, they became proof that I am stuck, unwilling to let go and move on. Trapped in sorrow and hurt, not knowing how to get out of this mess that I have made of my life. In this moment, I feel like these socks, unable to be repaired but not wanting to be tossed away. One of the few things I have from her that was given in love.

As the years have gone by and my mother has now retired to her permanent home in heaven, I sit here missing her, wearing the most pitiful pair of socks because at one time, I was loved, at one time I was whole. These socks make me feel safe and loved and today, I will not let go of them.

Author: Joy

I am Joy I am content I am patient I am love I am free, fabulous and fit. I am all these things and so much more. I am struggle I am hopelessness I am sad I am endurance I am a warrior I am a princess I am my Father's daughter I am a survivor of loss of hurt of pain. I am encouragement I am influence I am Joy.

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